


Just Let Me Adore You

by Yiffandquiff (paradisobound)



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: First Meeting, M/M, Smut, Snowed In, bed sharing, meet cute, mentions of cheating, mostly fluff with a hint of angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-23
Updated: 2019-12-23
Packaged: 2021-02-24 16:00:53
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,584
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21880618
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/paradisobound/pseuds/Yiffandquiff
Summary: Dan didn't know what to expect when he agreed to go to Switzerland with his brother to 'find themselves' again. But he certainly wasn't expecting a massive snow storm to pass by and completely shut down any roads, train stations, and airports. However, when the snow gets worse, a mysterious man stumbles into the hostel he's staying at, and Dan figures out pretty quickly that he and the man are going to have to get to know each other fast.
Relationships: Dan Howell/Phil Lester
Comments: 14
Kudos: 108
Collections: Phandom Fic Fests Holiday Exchange 2019





	Just Let Me Adore You

**Author's Note:**

  * For [outphan](https://archiveofourown.org/users/outphan/gifts).



> Hello! 
> 
> I really hope that you enjoy your fic! I had a lot of fun writing this but honestly, without the help of alittledizzy, I'm not sure that the fic would be where it is today! This fic quickly took over my life and I had so much fun creating this little world. I combined a few of the prompts that you gave me so I hope you don't mind! I hope this fits all of your bed-sharing, giggly sex, snowed in, fluffiness that you wanted! Hope you don't mind the smidge of angst towards the end. 
> 
> Sincerely,  
> your secret santa! 
> 
> Thanks to my beta's itsmyusualphannie and yikesola for looking over the fic for me to correct mistakes and sudden-sky for his validating comments on the side! I appreciate you all a lot for the help that made this fic where it is the best it could be.

Dan could curse out his brother for many things that have happened in his life, but this was definitely the icing on the metaphorical cake. They were in some remote place in the Swiss Alps and there was currently a blizzard outside. The snow was coming down so hard that he couldn’t even see outside of the window. 

He figures that he should be grateful that he is inside and not outside hiking somewhere like Adrian had suggested. They were supposed to be here on a quick trip to ‘find themselves’ again. Dan didn’t entirely know what any of that meant but he thought at the time that Adrian had suggested a hiking trip in the Swiss Alps in the middle of  _ fucking  _ February, he had taken the offer and figured  _ what could go wrong?  _

Well, apparently everything. 

First, their plane got delayed coming into Belgium and they nearly missed their connection to Interlaken. Secondly, their luggage got lost and had to be delivered to them in Bern and that took over a day for that to come in, which meant Dan slept in his skivvies the night before in a hostel and he very much didn’t appreciate that. Adrian had told him to just wear his clothing he had worn the day before, but Dan didn’t feel like wearing clothes that reeked of airplane  _ thank you very much.  _

But now, despite all of that happening, Dan accepting that those were clearly the worst that could happen to them, this happens. Dan had woken up to the blizzard outside when Adrian had tapped on his shoulder from the bottom bunk and sounded like an excited school-kid who was seeing snow in hopes of a day off. 

Dan was extremely frustrated—and a little bit upset to be quite frank. He shouldn’t have come on the trip and he doesn’t even know why he did anymore now that that he’s literally stuck in the hostel with his  _ sometimes obnoxious  _ younger brother with nowhere to even go. 

They’re currently sat in the downstairs lounge in front of an old fireplace with the other travelers. The host of their hostel had given them all free watered down hot chocolate to keep them warm and while Dan found it disgusting, he drank it anyway for the warmth that it gave him in his chest. 

It was freezing a bit in the hostel. He figures it was a part of being here in the winter during a storm, but he is bundled in his sweatshirt trying to keep warm as his toes screamed for heat through his socks. 

But the cold toes are kind of his fault because he thinks he stepped into a puddle of shower water in the communal washroom before he came down to the lounge and now it feels like his toes are freezing off. 

Adrian is off somewhere interviewing some older Swiss man in the corner next to the fireplace, and Dan is a bit annoyed with his ability to just go up to anyone and speak. Maybe he shouldn’t be so annoyed with his younger brother all the damn time, but he can’t help it. His brother is the one who  _ technically  _ brought him into this complete cluster-fuck. 

The room is still silent despite the crackling of the fire beside him and the small whispers of the people around them. No one is speaking too loudly and it’s quite nice to be in such a peaceful, relaxing environment, despite all of his annoyance just mere minutes before. That is, until the host steps into the room and makes an announcement. 

“Hello everyone! We’re under a code red warning due to the storm, so we’re afraid we have no way to go to and from here at the moment. Trains are cancelled and flights are grounded until further notice.” 

Dan groans along with everyone else, but just as soon as the collective groan is done, that’s when the real cluster-fuck begins of angry guests getting up and exclaiming their annoyance about how their  _ trips are now ruined  _ and  _ what are they supposed to do?  _

Dan takes a sip of his hot chocolate and pretends to not be laughing a bit inside at the distress of others. It makes him feel a bit happy that he’s not the only one completely and totally pissed at this situation. 

He looks down at his phone and sighs when he sees that he still has no service here. He hadn’t had any data here to begin with but the snowstorm has completely blocked any chance he had at trying to get a signal. The hostel has wifi, but it’s shitty and unsecured, and he doesn’t want to risk compromising his personal data just to scroll on his Tumblr for fifteen minutes. 

Adrian makes his way over to him eventually and sits down beside him. “I can’t wait to write up this interview and post it to my blog.” 

Dan sets down his cup of hot chocolate. “People still read blogs?” 

Adrian rolls his eyes. “People read  _ my  _ blog.” 

“If you say so.” 

Dan picks on Adrian. He admits that he does. So Adrian doesn’t take anything he says to heart and this is zero exception, since Adrian just laughs and begins to talk about how he comments on his blog all the time and how everyone seems to like what he says and how he documents his travels. 

Dan wants to respond by saying  _ sure, everyone feels that way.  _ Instead, he bites his tongue and just tells Adrian  _ good for him _ and then he goes back to sitting in silence, unsure of what to do now that he’s completely isolated from the rest of the world. 

“It’s a good thing we still have a week before our flight,” Adrian says. “I don’t want to have a cancelled flight back home because of the storm.” 

“I reckon flights will be going by then,” Dan says, more so hoping that he’s actually correct for the sake of helping his own head. 

“I’m hoping we can get a hike in before then.” 

Dan just laughs. “Whatever you say.” 

People are still bustling around the lounge. Some are threatening the host for the weather and some are screaming for no reason. Others are sitting calmly trying to figure out their new plans. Dan reckons that if it was a serious trip, he would be a mix of all of them, but he can’t honestly say. 

He’s still sitting there when the door to the hostel burst open and everyone stops and turns their head. There is a man standing in the doorway, his clothing and hair caked in endless snow. 

People remain silent as the man huffs and drops his bag onto the floor of the hostel and drops snow onto the floor. He begins to try and brush the snow off from himself but everyone is now rushing up to him and the host is running up to him with a towel and a blanket from the back. 

Dan watches in awe as the man is brushed off and warmed and wiped down off the actual layers of snow that were covering his clothing. He was shaking, shivering more like it, and his face was a pale shade of blue. Dan felt like he should do something to help as well, so he stands up and grabs one of the cups of hot chocolate on the table in the back of the lounge and takes it over to the man. 

The man is barely able to stop his teeth from chattering as the host is pulling the blanket around him and taking his wet clothing off somewhere else. He makes eye contact with Dan briefly as Dan hands him the cup. “Here. It’s hot chocolate. It’ll warm you up.” 

The man nods and reaches out, taking the cup with shaking hands. “Th-tha-thank-y-y-you,” he stutters and Dan bites his cheek as he lets go of the cup and the man brings it up to his lips, trying to sip. 

The host pushes the man further inside and forces him to sit next to the fireplace. She then grabs his bag from the doorway and brings it down the hallway to one of the rooms on the first floor. 

When she comes back, she sits besides the man and asks him a few questions. Dan overhears the man say that he was supposed to be in Interlaken on a work retreat, but his train was stopped and he walked the rest of the way here because he wanted to get to a hostel for the night. The hostess called him mad but the man didn’t listen and just continued to try and warm up. 

Dan feels bad for him. It isn’t his fault that his trip had gone to shit. Dan’s had done the same. This weather is just an unfortunate boundary to the mix. The man eventually stands up and leaves the lounge, making his way to one of the rooms. 

Dan can’t help but pay attention to him. There is something about the man that is intriguing to him. 

***

The hostel serves everyone cups of soup and bottles of water. It’s nothing fancy, but it’s enough to take the edge of hunger off as he tries not to panic at the mere thought of being stuck in this hostel for all five days that they’re here. 

He eventually decides that there is no use sitting in the lounge listening to everyone else moan about their ruined trips, so he makes his way to his room that he is sharing with his brother and a lovely older couple. He rounds the corner into the room and stops in his tracks when he sees the man from earlier sitting on the end of his bed, rifling through his bag with his back to him. 

“What are you doing? That’s my bed!” 

The man turns and startles as he drops a long white chord onto the floor next to the bed with a small clatter. “What?” 

“That’s my bed!” Dan repeats. “This is the bed the host told me was mine for the week!” 

“Well, uh,” the man stutters. “The hostess also told me this was going to be my bed until the trains started and I could get to my other destination.” 

Dan threw up his hands because this trip couldn’t  _ officially  _ get any worse, and yet it just keeps spiraling. “So the fuck do we reckon we do then?” 

The man shrugged. “The hostess told me that there weren’t any other beds available, so it beats me.” 

Dan lets out a loud sigh.  _ Great. On top of this trip being literally the worst, now he was going to more than likely have to share a bed with his brother for a week.  _

“I’m not happy about this situation either!” the man bites out. “I didn’t even want to come out here but it was my company’s idea and suddenly I’m on a plane heading to Switzerland. I didn’t want to be stuck here overnight, but I literally couldn’t travel any further without actually dying somewhere out there.” 

Dan does feel bad. He  _ does _ feel for the man. He wasn’t choosing to put into this shitty situation much like how Dan wasn’t choosing it either. It was just something that happened and there wasn’t anything they could do until the storm cleared. 

“It was your bed first,” the man says, “so I can try and find somewhere else to sleep.” 

Dan shakes his head. “No, that’s not—”

“We can share the bed?” 

Dan feels his eyes bug out his head. He’s never seen or met this man before and now he’s saying they could share a hostel bed? He has to be out of his mind, right? 

“Excuse me?” 

“Well, we both need a place to sleep and these beds aren’t too big but they’re not impossibly small. I’ll probably be gone come tomorrow anyway so might as well utilize what we have?” 

“By sharing a bed?” Dan reiterates. “I don’t even know you.” 

The man rolls his eyes. “Fine. My name is Phil. I’m from London but I grew up near Manchester. I’m currently working a bullshit job for the BBC where they have me apparently traveling to retreats in Switzerland during blizzards.” 

Dan lets out a laugh as he stares at Phil and Phil smiles back at him. His eyes are a deep blue, something Dan hadn’t noticed before. But it is kind of cute and he feels like he is swimming in them the longer he stares. He finally shakes himself out of his thoughts. 

“I’m Dan. I’m from Reading and I’m here on this trip with my hippie brother who thought we should come here to ‘find ourselves’ but it ain’t working and now I’m stuck here having to share a bed with a moderately attractive male from the north.” 

“Moderately attractive?” Phil asks with a smirk. 

Dan rolls his eyes and climbs up onto the bed next to him. “Take it or leave it, but scooch over. I’m taking a nap.” 

Phil laughs and Dan looks just in time to see Phil slip off the edge of the bunk and lower his feet to the floor. He walks out of the room and shuts the door behind him. Dan just lays there, thinking about how he was going to be sharing a bed with a man he hardly knew. 

But yet he wasn’t nervous about it. And maybe that’s what was scaring him a bit. 

***

“Did you enjoy your nap?” Phil asks him, sitting on the edge of the bed, now with a plate of sweets that the host had apparently made for the guests. 

Dan hadn’t actually slept, mostly lying in the bed and collecting his thoughts for a while before the door creaked open just now and Phil walked in with the sweets. 

He had offered Dan one but Dan just shook his head and said he’d get some in a bit. 

“It was alright,” Dan says eventually. 

“Just alright?” Phil asks. “Just alright is never alright.” 

"Actually shut up.” Dan snorts. “You talk a lot for someone who is talking to a stranger right now.” 

Phil shrugs. “We’ve introduced ourselves already and plus, I know you’re not a murderer. So I don’t mind talking with you.” 

“How do you know that?” Dan asks, flipping over onto his back as he looks at Phil sitting at the edge of the bed. 

“That you’re not a murderer?” Dan nods and Phil snorts out a laugh. 

“Well, that just gave it away.” 

Dan felt a smile pull at the corner of his lips as he sat up slowly on the bed and stretched out his sore back. These mattresses weren’t the most forgiving but he guesses he also can’t be arsed to complain. He does have a bed.. _.technically _ ...after all. 

“The hostess had the TV on for a bit to the news and they reckon that the storm is gonna stay over us until at least tomorrow afternoon.” 

Dan lets out a loud groan and Phil just nods in agreement. 

“This trip has gone to actual shit.” 

“Tell me about it,” Phil shook his head. “My company is all up in arms that I didn’t show up at the retreat and they’re expecting me there by the end of the week. Like I can just bundle up and head out into the snow like some yeti.” 

“Sounds like you need to find a new job, mate.” 

_ Like Dan can talk.  _

Dan didn’t even have a job back home. His income was literally made from working a few odd jobs around his town. He couldn’t settle on a job and maybe that’s why his life is so shit. And maybe that’s also why he’s 28 years old and living in a shitty rowhouse just down the road from his childhood home. He didn’t even make it far in life. 

“Not that simple,” Phil says, all matter-of-fact. “I kind of need this job to actually continue living in London.” 

“But if it treats you like shit, then why stay there?” 

“Because again, it’s not that simple.” 

Dan squeezes his lips together in a line and nods slowly, ending the conversation just as abrupt as it had started. 

Phil continues to nibble on his cookies and cakes and he offers Dan a cake one more time and Dan actually takes him up on the offer. He bites into it and tastes the coffee-chocolatey goodness and he smiles as he finishes it off and wipes the crumbs onto his joggers. 

“I got hired out of university at this job in London and I’ve been there for nearly ten years. If I left now, I would never find a job that paid me as well as this one does.”

Dan wasn’t expecting an actual explanation from Phil. Especially not when they barely know each other. But that definitely hits him a bit close to home and his chest does ache a bit deep inside, the cake no-longer settling well in his stomach. 

“I’m sorry?” Dan says, not sure what else to say. 

Phil shrugs and pushes the plate to the end of the bed. “It’s not the worst job in the world, not by any means. But it is times like this where I wonder why I’m still there.” 

“Times like when your company sends you to Switzerland and now you’re stuck sharing a bed with a very attractive male?” 

Phil lets out a loud snort. 

“Moderately attractive.” 

Dan lets out a scoff, acting like he’s offended. “Only moderately attractive?” 

“Two can play your game, mate.” 

Phil scoots off from the bed and plants his feet on the floor, grabbing the dirty plate as he walks out of the room. Dan is left sitting on the bed with a blush creeping into his cheeks and  _ suddenly the room is hotter than it was just five minutes ago.  _

***

Dan eventually makes his way out to the lounge with everyone else. Phil is out there mingling with some of the older couples and Adrian is off in the corner with his laptop and his camera sitting on an end table. At least one of them was being a bit productive on this ‘vacation.’ 

He grabs a few of the remaining sweets and a small glass of mulled wine that the hostess had poured out and he sipped it gently as he ate a few more of the cakes and wiped the crumbs away as discreetly as he could. 

Phil slipped away down the hall not long after Dan had walked into the lounge and Dan figured that Phil was probably exhausted and needed to rest. So Dan didn’t question it when he sat down in the lounge, which had a view down the hallway, and he saw Phil carrying a black bag into the bathroom, probably to shower and freshen up. 

Dan stayed in the lounge for a while, and he eventually did make small talk with a German girl who was supposed to be visiting her boyfriend in Italy but her flight got cancelled so she had to make plans here. Dan felt bad for her because as she was explaining how she only saw her boyfriend every four or five months, it made his heart ache about how fortunate--or he thought he had been-- with his ex-boyfriend. 

_ But he isn't ready to talk about that right now.  _

He isn't sure if he was ready to talk about that ever, if he is being honest. And especially now that he’s sharing a bed with Phil...well, he won’t get into any of that. His mind is already a bit rattled as it is. 

The clock on the mantel of the fireplace reads half-past eleven and most of the people had gone to the bedrooms for the night, Adrian included. Dan was left in the lounge with the German girl, who said her name was Lydia, and the older couple who also shared his room. They were busy reading newspapers on the couch across the room, not even bothered by anything around them. 

He makes his way to his room and tip-toes inside as quietly as he can as he grabs his toiletry bag and snuck a peak up at his own bed. But Phil wasn’t there. The sheets were thrown back in a bit of disarray, but he wasn’t in the bed. 

Dan figures he might be in the bathroom, maybe something didn’t settle with his stomach. He knows firsthand how badly traveling can disrupt everything. So he shakes it off, heading back outside and down the hall to the bathroom. 

He presses open the door that says 'Male' and goes up to the sink counter, setting his stuff down. As he turns around, ready to head into one of the stalls, his heart stops in his tracks as he comes face to face with a very naked Phil in the shower, the glass door not leaving anything to the imagination. 

He shouldn’t be staring but  _ fuck,  _ Phil is hung, and it’s so hard to not stare. The shower is suddenly turned off and Dan gasps as he rushes inside the toilet stall and sits onto the seat, catching his breath. He waits until he hears the opening and shutting of the bathroom door. When he walks back out, he looks at himself in the mirror and sees the flush on his cheeks, his skin tomato red. He turns on the cold tap on the sink and splashes his face with water. 

Dan finishes up, brushing his teeth and washing his face before he packs up his stuff and heads back to the bedroom. His heart is racing out of his chest and he feels a little bit sick as he realizes that he now has to share a bed with the same guy he just saw naked and  _ very much  _ is feeling  _ something  _ for. 

Fuck. 

He pushes open the door to the bedroom and takes a deep breath as he sees Phil laying as close to the wall as he can, the screen of his cell phone lighting up his face. His hair is still damp but he’s wearing glasses now and his phone screen is reflecting on them. He’s on Reddit. 

Dan sets down his stuff in the small dresser they had been provided and then decides _fuck it_ and he climbs into the bed. He’s settling down next to Phil when it’s abundantly made clear that this bed's not big enough for both of them to lay down on their backs. It’s just not happening. Dan’s shoulder is over Phil’s and they’re literally elbowing each other and it’s just not ideal in any capacity. 

“This isn’t going to work,” Dan whispers. 

“We’ll make it work,” Phil whispers back. 

Phil turns his phone off and sits up, setting it down off from the bed along with his glasses. When he sits back, he turns on his side and motions for Dan to do the same. “Turn.” 

“On my side?” 

“Yes. We’re going to spoon.” 

“ _ Oh, no fucking--”  _ Dan quickly shakes his head and Phil rolls his eyes. 

“It’s either we spoon and both fit on the bed or one of us sleeps on the floor. Take your pick.” 

Dan’s beginning to feel like the offer to sleep on the floor seems more plausible. But he also really would like to be able to sleep on a bed for the night, so he quickly decides that it can’t be the worst possible thing to spoon with Phil, right? 

Dan turns on his side without another word and Phil settles behind him, their bodies barely touching. Dan tries to ignore the hitch in his breath when Phil’s hand delicately finds its way to Dan’s stomach. 

“Is this okay?” Phil asks. “I just don’t have a place for it without it just awkwardly squished between us.” 

Dan nods and tries to ignore how the fluttering feelings in his chest are starting up again. 

Dan doesn’t fall asleep easily. But Phil behind him does, snoring softly in his ear.

It’s when Dan does fall asleep and wake up the next morning where everything goes south... _ literally.  _ Because he wakes up with the feeling of Phil’s hard dick pressing directly into his butt cheek. It’s so painfully obvious and he doesn’t know what to do because...well, because he  _ doesn’t  _ know Phil. Well, he  _ does _ know Phil, but not well enough to know what to do when Phil is hard. 

With Dan’s ex, he could just turn around, shove his hand down his pants and finish him off, but he can’t do that with Phil. Not like he wants to anyway. 

And he’s far too awkward to do anything anyway so he does what any other person would do in this situation. He pulls away from Phil’s grasp, shuffles off from the bed, grabs his stuff and walks to the bathroom. 

When he heads back into the room to put his stuff away, Phil has starfished out on the bed and Dan’s body aches with exhaustion. He goes into the lounge and grabs a cup of semi-warm coffee and tries to get the caffeine kick that he needs now that he can see the clock on the mantel read a little after six. 

Adrian makes his way out at around 7 and gets himself a cup of coffee as well. Dan greets him with a smile and Adrian gives him a look of confusion back. 

“Did you sleep out here last night?” he asks. 

Dan shakes his head. “No, I slept in my bed.” 

“Then why was there a random man in it?” Adrian asked. “I saw him when I just got up.” 

Dan bites his lip and fights off the funny look on Adrian’s face. “The host put him up in that bed thinking it was open so we’re sharing it until he leaves.” 

Adrian cocks his head. “You could have shared one with me. I reckon it’s better than sleeping with a stranger.” 

_ Oh boy.  _

Dan just shakes his head and continues to sip at his now-second cup of coffee that morning. 

Slowly, as everyone else wakes up and comes out, the host puts out more coffee and breakfast for them. A lot of people are still grumpy, but many have accepted the inevitability of their problem. 

The hostess tells them all that the storm is clearing out a bit more, but the code red is remaining for their town until tomorrow morning, which meant travel was still impossible. Dan, of course, isn’t happy about that. But a part of him also isn’t upset by that either because it means more time for him to get to know Phil. 

Speaking of which, Phil comes wandering out looking the most refreshed out of everyone. His hair is perfectly styled, his glasses look great on him, and his skin even has a healthy glow. Dan’s jealous of that because he knows for a fact that he looks like a walking corpse right about now. 

Phil helps himself to the breakfast too and fixes himself up a cup of coffee, but Dan notices how he pours round after round of sugar into the cup. Dan cringes because  _ how can someone drink something so sweet?  _ He likes his coffee dark and bitter. 

Phil takes a seat next to him and Adrian and he smiles at them both. “How are you both this morning?” he asks. 

Both of them groan. 

“Oof,” Phil says. “Hopefully your day gets better as it goes on.” 

“Have you spoken to your work yet?” Dan asks. “Because the host just told us that the code red warning isn’t being lifted until tomorrow morning.” 

Phil lets out a sigh and runs his hand through his hair. “Fuck. Yeah, I’ll have to call, I suppose.” 

“At least you’ll be out of here soon.” 

It’s meant to come off as a joke, but for some reason Dan’s voice just comes off as sad and a bit defeated. He doesn’t mean for it to, but it’s too late to take it back when Phil catches his eye and then glances back down at his coffee, stirring it absentmindedly with a spoon. 

“Yeah,” is all Phil says. 

***

The day went by pretty uneventful, much like Dan was expecting it to. Phil had settled into their room for most of the day to make all of his calls and Adrian had gone off doing something that Dan didn’t quite catch before he took off. 

So Dan spent the day doing absolutely nothing. And he was bored out of his goddamn mind. He needed something to preoccupy his thoughts and for him, the only thing he could think of was, well,  _ getting off.  _

It’d been a while since he’d been able to get off, mostly because of the fact that he was here and also the fact that he just didn’t ever think about it when he was home. Mostly because he had other things to think about instead than the primal urge to clear his thoughts. 

He gathers his shampoo, his conditioner, and his body wash and razor, and he takes it to the shower and sets up inside one of the stalls. He triple checks to make sure no one is around, and then he undresses and hops inside, turning the water on. 

He adjusts the temperature to the perfect temperature and then he quickly shampoos and conditions his hair before deciding if he wanted to actually go through with this, he had to do it now. 

He reached down over his chest and cups himself in his hand, squeezing gently and letting out a quiet sigh of pleasure. He’s beginning to harden and he takes himself into his hand and strokes slowly up and down to help himself out. 

It’s a bit raw, and he needs something to help himself out so he squeezes a little bit of conditioner into his palm, which definitely does the trick. 

He’s feeling really good about now, letting the pleasure and everything around him settle into a comfortable haze. He’s so enveloped into chasing his own orgasm that he doesn’t hear the door open to the bathroom. Just as he’s gearing up to climax, a voice enters his thoughts. 

“Are you enjoying yourself?” 

Dan snaps out of his thoughts and quickly shuts off the water in a half-assed attempt to make it look like he was 100% not doing what he was actually doing. He quickly grabs his towel and covers himself and opens the glass door to see Phil stood by the sink, his hands bracing himself up backwards. 

“I—that was…”

Phil laughed. “It’s okay, mate. We all need to relieve some stress every once and awhile.” 

“ _ Ugh, _ this is super embarrassing,” Dan groans, hoping his face isn’t as red as he thinks it is right now. He can’t see himself in the reflection of the mirror from this angle. 

“I have no room to judge,” Phil said. “I had to do the same last night to unwind before bed. It’s natural.” 

Dan’s cheeks are feeling uncomfortably hotter as he realizes that he literally saw Phil post-wank the night before when he stepped into the bathroom. 

“This feels so weird,” Dan says, grabbing his stuff out of the stall and walking to the counter. 

“Just be glad that it wasn’t one of the old guys who walked in and it was just me,” Phil says, a cheeky grin on his face. “Although next time, if you’d like some help, you can ask me?” 

Dan doesn’t have time to respond before Phil is pushing himself off from the counter and walking out the door. Dan nearly falls to the floor of the bathroom as his knees get weak. 

_ What the fuck is this man doing to him?  _

***

The snow lets up sometime into the afternoon and the relief on everyone’s faces when they can finally see out the windows is actually kind of hysterical. But even Dan is feeling the weight of everything lifted from his shoulders as he walked over to the door of the hostel and is able to look out on the town and see people outside trying to clean up. 

The hostess tells everyone that everyone was working hard to clean up the snow so travel could begin, but she also doesn't sound very promising with that statement either. And apparently people didn’t think the statement was very  _ promising  _ either, as many of them continued to complain and grumble to each other. 

Adrian comes back to the hostel not long after the snow has stopped, he’s carrying his backpack and his camera in his hands. He drops both onto the couch in the lounge and begins to go through them. Dan doesn’t question where he’s been or anything, he just leaves him be. 

Dan doesn’t see Phil either, which makes him a bit anxious after their interaction in the shower earlier that afternoon. A part of him feels like he imagined that entire interaction and there was no way Phil actually caught him wanking, but he knows he did. He  _ knows  _ that happened. 

There isn’t any more use denying it. 

The hostess ends up making a grand-ish dinner for everyone complete with various meats, vegetables, and drinks.Dan feels very fortunate that they actually picked a hostel where the person running it cares about their guests and their comfort. 

Phil comes out while everyone else is eating. He takes his plate of food and heads back down the hall, and for some reason, that feels like an invitation to Dan to go talk with him. He doesn’t know why but it feels like something is really wrong. 

He takes his plate of food and heads down the hallway to his room, pushing open the door to see Phil sitting on the bed, his legs folded under him, picking away at his plate of food. 

“You okay?” 

Phil jumps and looks up, catching Dan’s eye. “Not really.” 

Dan jumps onto the bed beside him and sets his food down between them. Phil does the same. “Anything you want to talk about?” 

“I quit my job.” 

Dan pauses and his eyes widen as he turns his head to Phil. “You what?” 

“I followed your advice because I realized you were right. That job made me miserable. They sent me to retreats all the time and never treated me like a human being. I don’t even remember the last time they had me doing something I actually wanted to. I was talking on the phone with my boss and he was literally screaming at me to get to the conference and literally risk my life and I won’t do that anymore,” Phil says. “I won’t let them treat me like that anymore.” 

“I’m so sorry.” 

“Don’t be,” Phil reassures. “You actually helped me a lot. Not gonna lie, I’ll probably regret this in a weeks' time, but right now I’m feeling pretty good.” 

Dan feels his cheeks heat up. “Kind of hard to believe that after my entire life of shitty luck that I can meet a random bloke and immediately give him the right advice.” 

Phil just gives him a small smile. “Well, it happened.” 

They eat in silence with each other and after their plates are empty, they throw them on the set of drawers next to the bed and they just sit in silence, keeping each other company. Dan swallows back any of the feelings that are bubbling in his chest. He’s getting the overwhelming feeling to just spit out all of the feelings that he’s had built up in the last few years of his life, but Phil is  _ still  _ a stranger. No matter how Dan looks at it. He doesn’t know him.

But yet at the same time, it feels like he’s known him forever. 

“I was really lost,” Dan says. “I tried to go to Uni in Manchester for law and I realized pretty quickly that it was not something I wanted to do for the rest of my life. So I dropped out of school and moved back home to Wokingham.” He pauses. “My mum, at the time, wasn’t very happy but she didn’t say anything about it. I think she was disappointed but tried not to show it for the sake of  _ wanting to be a good parent  _ because the lord knows, she wasn’t most of my life. But I let it slide.” 

He took the time to look over at Phil and he realized Phil was staring at him, listening with full intent. So Dan continued on. 

“Then I met a guy at Reading Festival in the crowd at the Panic! At the Disco show and we hit it off pretty well. I moved in with him in a shitty flat in Reading and we were together for over six years. Kind of ended abruptly when I came home from being at my mum’s for the weekend and caught him in bed with his co-worker.” 

“Oh God, that’s awful, Dan!” 

“Apparently he had been seeing this girl on the side almost the entire length of our relationship. I didn’t notice it and putting it frankly, I don’t think I ever would have. But I spiralled pretty fast and my depression that was already bad got worse and I moved back home for a few months to try and sort myself out. I actually just moved into an old row house in Reading about two months ago. And then my brother invited me on this trip because he said going to Switzerland would help me maybe rediscover the part of myself that I lost when I had been with Joshua all those years. So here I am.” 

“No offense, mate, but your life sounds pretty shitty.” 

Dan lets out a loud snort and it’s followed soon after by a fit of giggles as he just nods and looks at Phil again and says, “You have no idea.” 

“So basically our lives were both pretty shitty but just in their own ways?” Phil asks. 

Dan laughs. “And somehow the universe brought us both here at the same time.” 

“Isn’t it weird how fate works?” 

Dan didn’t believe in fate, but even he had to admit this was an amazing coincidence. 

They fell asleep without meaning too and when Dan woke up, Phil’s head was resting on his lap. His back was killing him and his butt was numb, but Phil’s weight on his lap actually felt really comforting and really grounding. 

He hadn’t told anyone about what had happened with Joshua. He literally told himself he wouldn’t burden the pain he’d felt onto another person. But some reason, spilling everything to Phil felt exactly like he what he needed to do. And the fact that Phil listened to him the entire time made him feel so much more at ease about airing his ‘dirty laundry’ out in the open. 

His aching bladder forces him to get up so he gently moves Phil so he could slide off from the bed. He makes his way to the bathroom and quickly does his business before washing his hands and heading back to the room. 

Phil is just waking up, stretching his arms out as he yawns and settles back against the wall. He sees Dan come in and he smiles. “Didn’t mean for that to happen.” 

“I was exhausted, so it was bound to happen eventually.” 

“Did you not sleep well?” 

Dan shrugs, trying to not make it a big deal that he literally couldn’t fall asleep because he was too focused on the attractive man spooning him. “I slept okay.” 

“Was...was it because we were...you know?” Phil hesitates. “Because we really don’t have to do that. I’m perfectly okay with finding somewhere else to sleep.” 

“No, there isn’t a need.” Dan counters. “I actually...had kind of the opposite problem.” 

Phil cocked his head. “What do you mean?” 

“I was too focused on the fact that I had an attractive guy pressed up against me so...maybe that was it?” 

“Oh, so I’m attractive now?” Phil jokes. “Climbing up the ladder?” 

“Maybe so.” 

They both laugh and Phil slides off from the bed onto his feet and they walk out together into the lounge where the hostess has brought out some board games for the guests. 

Adrian is currently deep in a chess match with the old Swiss man he had interviewed the day before while others were playing various things like Checkers and card games. Dan opts for just sitting on the couch and pulling out his phone, which... _ still doesn’t _ have any service, so he tries to connect it to the WiFi. He manages to get it connected enough where he can load a single pixel on Twitter but it’s something. 

“What’s your number?” Phil’s voice cuts through. 

Dan turns to Phil who has now sat down beside him with a cup of hot chocolate in his hand from the table off to the side of them. 

“My number?” Dan asks. 

“Yeah, you know the thing you call and text with?” 

Dan smirks. “You’re not very smooth in asking for people’s numbers, are you?” he jokes. 

A smile forms slowly on Phil’s lips before it disappears and he pulls out his phone and hands it to Dan. “Put your number in.” 

So Dan does. He puts his number into Phil’s contacts and then Phil texts Dan to save his number. Even with the shitty WiFi, the text still comes through and he adds Phil’s name to his phone. 

They sit around the fireplace together and eventually the sun begins to set and everything seems like it’s going well. So Dan and Phil both get ready for bed and Dan climbs into bed besides Phil for another night, except this time he sleeps a lot more soundly. 

***

Dan wakes up feeling a lot less uneasy than he had the day before. He and Phil are back-to-back now, and while they’re touching, Dan’s almost glad that Phil isn’t pressed up against him again. 

It doesn’t help either that Dan’s hard. He knows this is normal, he’s woken up hard plenty of other times like other men. But it feels a lot worse and more like a burden than anything right now. 

He sighs, trying his best to let out some steam without actually  _ letting out some steam  _ and he tries to roll onto his side a bit more. Phil chooses to stir in that moment and Dan holds his breath as he waits to see what Phil is going to do. Turns out what he’s going to do is turn around and completely press himself up against Dan’s backside. 

Dan’s breath hitches and he looks across the room to see that the elderly couple are gone from their bed and when he looks down a bit more, he can just barely see that Adrian is gone too. All of this means that he and Phil were completely and utterly alone in the room right now. 

Phil’s hand finds its way onto Dan’s stomach over his shirt and his chest fluttered as his touches gently across the skin of the abdomen. It’s tender, a heat slowly building and coursing through his veins as he shivered and keened at the touch. 

Dan’s not even sure that Phil is consciously doing anything. It feels more like Phil’s body is asleep and he’s reacting to the touch all on his own and somehow, that makes Dan’s cheeks heat up even more. 

He could let Phil’s hand wander lower, into his waistband, and down to his cock. But he also feels like that’s crossing the line of an imaginary boundary that Dan isn’t even sure is there. But then Phil’s hand moves and it’s now creeping across his hip, and down his thigh a bit, squeezing his flesh gently. Dan lets out a sigh, and with that sigh, Phil suddenly stirs and his hand is ripping away from Dan’s skin, leaving a burning trail in its departure. 

“I’m sorry,” Phil mumbles, turning a bit so they weren’t exactly touching any more. “I didn’t mean to get completely touchy with you.” 

Dan turns his head and comes face to face with the sleepy face of Phil and he lets a soft smile play over his lips, “I didn’t mind,” he admits. “It felt kind of nice.” 

“So,” Phil says, turning on his side again, placing his hand back on Dan’s thigh, “you wouldn’t mind if I just...continued?” 

Dan’s breathing hitched in his throat and he turned his head quickly to make sure he was right in the fact that no one was in the room too and nodded slowly, “Yeah.” 

Phil’s hand was edging towards his waistband now, creeping up the fabric of his joggers and making its way into his pants, touching the skin between his hip and his cock. It was intimate, and the heat from it made Dan’s stomach coil as Phil’s hand suddenly wrapped around him and Dan threw his head back, biting his lip as Phil stroked quickly. 

_ It shouldn’t feel like this,  _ Dan supposes. He feels like a giddy teenager letting his boyfriend get to third base in his bedroom with his parents down the hall. It feels a bit wrong, but the thought of that this was happening so openly, so publicly and unashamed, made Dan let out a giggle that he never meant to happen. 

“What was that?” Phil asks, stopping his hand and leaving the warmth of his palm still wrapped around him. 

“Sorry,” Dan says, giggling a bit more. “I just...there is just something about us doing this that’s like bringing me back to the first time I ever got off with another boy in my old teenage bedroom at my parents house.” 

Phil furrows his brows and then giggles as well, “Is that a good thing or a bad thing?” 

“Good thing,” Dan says, “Now keep going please.” 

Dan finishes faster than he’d like to admit but when he does finish, Phil pulls him out his pants just in time for him to spill over his abdomen. When the sleepiness is setting in and the fatigue is coursing through his bones, he turns to Phil and looks him over and asks, “Do you want me to return the favor?” 

Phil shakes his head, “Watching you kind of sent me over the edge as well.” 

Dan let out a loud laugh and turned, pressing his face into Phil’s chest without even meaning to. Dan went to recoil, move away and establish those boundaries between them again as just being mere strangers, but Phil doesn’t let him. Dan finds himself pressing closer against Phil, and as he’s shutting his eyes and taking it all in, he feels the gentle caress of a kiss against his cheek. 

And he’s suddenly aware that he doesn’t want Phil to just be a stranger anymore. 

***

By the mid-afternoon, the hostess told them all that the roads were reopened and trains and flights were back to normal. This meant that most of the guests in the hostel packed up their bags and began to leave, making their way to the destinations that they were supposed to be at. 

Dan found himself sitting in the lounge, a strange pull of tension in the air as he looked around at all of the people bundling themselves up for the cold and walking out of the doors of the hostel with their bags in hand. Dan knows that he and Adrian are here for a few more days, but it still is a bit daunting to see everyone else leaving. Dan almost feels like he should be leaving too and moving on to the next place. 

But nothing compares to the sting in his chest when he goes to his shared room that evening and sees Phil packing up his suitcase and putting all of his things away, almost like he was getting ready to leave himself. 

“You’re leaving already?” Dan finds himself asking, ignoring the tightness in his throat. 

Phil turns his head and nods, “The BBC is paying for one final flight home and it departs at half past midnight.” 

“Tonight?” Dan asks, feeling his stomach tighten even more. 

Phil nods again, “Yeah, I have a taxi picking me up in about an hour.” 

Dan bites his lip and holds back the tears that prick at his eyes at how he’s come to want to be with Phil, not leaving his side any time soon. He doesn’t want to have Phil out of his life just as soon as he walked into it. 

“I’m going to miss you,” Dan says gently. 

Phil turns on his heels and extends his arms open and Dan finds himself running into them, wrapping his arms tightly around him and just letting himself become enveloped within them for a short time. 

“Don’t become a stranger with me now?” Phil asks as he pulls away. 

“Did we ever really move past being strangers?” Dan teases. 

Phil just shakes his head and flashes a smile at him, and somehow the thought of Phil leaving doesn't hurt as much it did minutes before. Mostly because there was something telling Dan that Phil wasn’t going anywhere in his life...he was going to be here for a while. 

Phil leaves out the door of the hostel just over an hour later, getting into a taxi just on the other side, and Dan tries to ignore how his chest tightens just a bit more. He distracts himself that night by discussing his plans for the next day with Adrian, but he hates how his bed now feels so much emptier than it did just a few days before. 

***

Dan gets a text from Phil exactly one hour after he lands in London and is about to take the train from Kings Cross to Reading. He’s exhausted, cursing Adrian for picking such an early flight after he’d spent the last few days hiking and climbing every possible peak Adrian could find. 

Dan tries to ignore how his heart beats a bit faster and when he looks at it, his lips curl into a tighter smile: 

**Phil:** _ Are you back in the land of the Queen yet?  _

Dan laughs and takes a seat on the bench on the platform next to Adrian and types back a message. 

**Dan:** _ Just about to head back to Reading. _

Their train arrives at the platform and Adrian stands up when it approaches but Dan finds himself sitting there, remaining in his place as he waits for Phil’s text. 

**Phil:** _ Boo. Was hoping you would want to meet up and go to lunch. Rain check?  _

Dan sees the train doors open and Adrian turns to look at him, “Are you coming?” He asks. 

Dan bites his lip and shakes his head, standing up, “I’ll catch a later train. I have to meet up with someone.” 

Twenty minutes later, he’s sitting in a Starbucks with Phil, his luggage sitting obnoxiously at the end of the table as they exchange knowing glances and flirtatious words. 

Dan doesn’t leave London for a week, and when he finally goes home, he leaves his luggage with clean clothing that he washed at Phil’s flat because he knows he’s going to be there again soon. 


End file.
